Governor Abbot decided that beginning March 10, it is no longer mandatory to wear a mask, and businesses can open 100%. Well you’re a big kid and can make your own decision. So here’s why you should decide to continue wearing your mask.
5. The Governor Said Not To
With our governor, you really gotta take everything he says, and pretend it’s Opposite Day. He signed legislation making it legal for social workers to discriminate against the handicapped, like he’s NOT IN A WHEELCHAIR. Is this your king??
4. To Save Your Confidence
You’ve never gotten as many women than before Covid. And that’s because the mask hides your halitosis! By the time you’re ready to take off the mask and get close to them, they already like you so it’s too late for them to back out. So keep the mask on. Your pride depends on it.
3. March Just Started!
We had a terrorist attack in January, Gorilla Glue Girl in February…now the governor wants you to take your mask off in March. Stay woke fam, this is clearly all a conspiracy to make sure each month has a viral moment. But at this rate, the world will end by September! Can we PLEASE make it to 2022??
2. It’s YOUR CHOICE
Just like ppl can storm the capital with guns and peacefully protest their right to NOT wear a mask…..it’s your body, and your choice, and you can choose to be smart. I mean be real: not one time has the governor ever just put his foot down and said “No. I’m doing what’s best for Texas.” So if he’s not gonna stand up for me, I’ll stand up for myself. And if you come by me with no mask, I’ll sit you down.
1. The Virus is Still Here!
Texas surpassed two million Covid cases, but is almost last in vaccinations per capita. In other words…If Tommy has 10 customers but 3 grams, he should stop selling drugs because he clearly never finished math, like your dumb ass governor.